<TITLE>19. Par 123-129</TITLE>L-123 Up the canyon I went, unbuttoned my big red coat, and I was running up the canyon like this around. The first thing you know, I thought, "My, where did I turn off at?" Wind was already down, the trees lapping together. I thought, "Where did I turn off at?" I went around. I--I knowed I was going right straight to Hurricane Mountain. But I happened to stop, and I was sweating; I thought, "What's the matter here? I've been gone a half hour, or three quarters, and I can't find that place I turned off." I looked up, and there hung my deer. I was right at the same place. I thought, "Well, what did I do?"

L-124 Well, I took off again. I thought, "I'll make it this time, I just wasn't noticing." I watched every little move everywhere, watching. I kept searching, searching, searching. Them clouds coming, I know a snowstorm was on the road, fog hanging low, and then I begin to notice. I thought, "I'll go a little further," went on, on, on, on, on, on, on. And I thought, "Well, this is strange, look like I've seen this place before." And I looked, and there hung my deer. See?
You know what I was on? The Indians call it the "death walk." See, you're walking in a circle, round and around. Well, I thought I was too good a guide to ever be lost. See, nothing had to tell me the woods, I knowed my way around. See?
And I started off again. I said, "I can't make this mistake." And I come back again.

L-127 I moved up the canyon a little piece, then it had done started blowing. Oh, my, snow everywhere. Almost towards dark. And I knew that Meda would die that night in the wilderness; she didn't know how to take care of herself. And Billy was just about four years old, three years old, just a little bitty thing. And I thought, "What will they do?" Well, I got up this far and I hit some moss bed, I thought, "I'm in a flat somewhere, and I can't see up--nothing; it's all foggy." I was going around now.
Ordinarily, I'd have found me a place and holed up, if I had somebody with me. I'd holed up and wait till the storm was over, a day or two, and come on out. Cut my piece of deer--over in the back, and went in, eat, and forgot about it. But you can't do that, and your wife and baby laying up there in the woods, perishing. See?

L-129 So I begin to think, "What can I do?" So I went a little farther. And I thought, "Now, wait. When I crossed over that first valley, the wind was in my face, so I must've come this a-way. I've got to come this way." And I had wandered way down in the giants, but I didn't know where I was at. I said, "Oh." I begin to get nervous. And I thought, "Wait a minute, Bill, you're not lost," trying to bluff myself. You can't bluff it. No, no. That inner conscience tells you you're wrong.
Oh, you--you try to say, "Oh, I'm saved; I go to church." Don't you worry, you wait till that deathbed comes, and you'll know it's different. Your conscience tells you. Something inside of you tells you you're wrong. See? You know if you'd die you couldn't meet a holy God. As we seen Him last night, even the holy Angels have to veil their face to stand before Him. How are you going to stand outside the Blood of Jesus Christ to veil you?


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